Man, to be 25 again. Those days were wild. You were wild. And the sex? Yep, wild. You could stay up all night and still be at your desk by 9am the next morning, bleary eyed but with that giant grin on your face. And then, life happened. Job stress. Kids. Mortgage payments. The responsibilities grew and your sex life shrank. Things may have stalled in that department and now neither of you is sure how to restart the engine. Don’t worry, we’ve got you covered. Now that you’ve got this guide, you’re just a few tips away from getting those Wild West days back again. You’re reading this, which means you’re thinking about it, and thinking about it is the perfect first step. Now, keep reading because we’ve got 25 sex tips to make you both feel 25 again.

1. Make out

Snogging, necking, rounding the bases. Sometimes it’s best to get back to basics. Think of a long, lazy make-out session as the sexy equivalent of a slow burn. You don’t even have to go all the way – the journey is the destination.

2. Make out somewhere that feels illicit (but won’t get you arrested)

There’s something about the fear of discovery, the potential for twigs stuck in your hair and the what-have-you-two-been-doing looks from passersby that revs things up just enough.

3. Spice up date night

Instead of your usual dinner-and-a-movie night, book a surprise suite at a hotel and go all out with champagne, strawberries – and a late checkout. Getting out of your normal routine will help…get you out of your normal routine.

4. Slow it down

Some things in life shouldn’t be rushed, and this is one of them. Clear your mind of deadlines, stress and worries and savour every second of skin against skin. Taking your time can be the gift that keeps on giving.

5. Or make it quick.

On the other hand, sometimes a quick – and dirty – tryst is what you both need. Don’t even give yourselves time to put your briefcases down, head straight to the couch or the bedroom after work.

6. Sexting isn’t just for teenagers

Throughout the day send a few text messages, just flirty and dirty enough to make her blush and have her wondering what you have in store for later. Encourage her to reciprocate, but don’t put any pressure on her. She may need to ease into this part, so feel free to lead the way.

7. Talk dirty in real life, too

Whisper sweet something-somethings in her ear over dinner, telling her how sexy she looks and exactly what you’d like to do later (then be sure to follow through).

8. Go shopping for toys together.

No, not at that seedy truck stop place off the highway. Find a woman-friendly or woman-owned shop that caters to couples, it's more likely to feel safe and sexy for both of you. If you don’t have one in your town, stores like Babes in Toyland or Good Vibrations have good online selections you can choose from together.

9. Stock the kitchen with aphrodisiac foods

Chocolates, cherries, chilli peppers and a host of other foods are recognised for their bedroom-boosting powers. Instead of crunching popcorn during your next movie night, try one of these. Chilli peppers too spicy? Drink watermelon juice to cool you down – and heat you up.

10. Make a sexy mix-tape

Put together a playlist of songs that put you both in the mood and play it when you have the house to yourselves. Start the evening with a slow dance and see where your moves take you.

11. Read something sexy together

Ask her to share with you a shade of Grey she particularly likes or have her describe it to you. Getting erotic inspiration from literature is a good way to stimulate both your body and your mind.

12. Plan a second honeymoon

Revisiting your honeymoon location or choosing another exotic locale can help hit the reset button on your sex life. Dedicate your trip to finding your way back to each other, one sexy day at a time.

13. Pick a new position to try

Admit it – it’s been a while since you’ve taken the time to try something new. You’re tired, she’s stressed, and neither of you has the energy to try too hard. But changing up positions can have you both feeling like new again. And you don’t necessarily need acrobatics, even a slightly different position or angle can make all the difference.

14. Set up a couples massage session

Getting blissed out and relaxed together from the outside in can be the perfect way to break down whatever barriers are keeping you apart. If you’re planning a getaway together, see if the hotel spa offers in-room couples massages so you won’t have far to commute to the bedroom afterwards.

15. Wear a scent she loves

Work on wooing her sense of smell with an aromatic cologne or body spray. Take her shopping with you to find one that makes her want to lean in and stay close.

16. Do yoga together

It doesn’t even have to be Tantric yoga, though that isn’t a bad idea either. Getting your blood flowing together while clearing your minds of distractions could be just what you need to rekindle your connection.

17. Shower together

You can plan your joint shower in advance to build the anticipation or make a spontaneous decision to join her after her workout. Either way, soaping up together can be a fun way to keep things anything but clean.

18. Ask her to wear something you think she looks sexy in

It can be fancy lingerie or one of your work shirts – and nothing else – as long as it’s something that puts that lustful look back in your eyes. She’ll appreciate your appreciation, and you know where that leads.

19. Do penis rings actually work? There’s only one way to find out

Do your homework, find a ring that’s right for both of you and see what happens. Note: Rings are not to be worn for more than 30 minutes, so plan accordingly.

20. Relax

That’s right, chill out. Getting your groove back may take some work, but really, this is the fun part of life! Take some deep breaths, do a minute of meditation, push your shoulders down from your ears and remember not to take yourself too seriously.

21. Turn your fantasies into realities

Take turns writing down 3-5 fantasies and sit down to separate them into “yes, please,” “no way, no how” and “call me, maybe.” Once a month, make a date to try out the yes pile.

22. Hold hands

File under: Back to Basics. The simple intimacy of having your palms touch and your fingers intertwined can be just the physical contact spark you need.

23. Ask her what she wants you to do. Then do it. Again

There’s that one thing you do that sends her over the edge, but she may be too shy to ask for it. Ask her what it is and make it happen. In fact, make it a habit.

24. Find erotic films you both like.

Make it a fun challenge to find films or sex scenes that turn you both on. You may be surprised by what images – or even actors – she likes.

25. Tell her she’s beautiful

Compliments can be the most potent aphrodisiac of all. You both want to feel desirable and desired, and few things are more powerful than praise.

Erectile dysfunction is a common problem, and this problem comes with no shortage of treatment options. There are several ED solutions available, ranging from oral and injectiable medications to surgical implants. These solutions can raise concerns for people who are uncomfortable putting drugs into their body that they are unfamiliar with. They also present issues for men currently on medications, as another pill is something they need to avoid.

Fortunately several natural solutions for erectile dysfunction exist. Many of them are supplements that are derived from various plants, while others are found in common foods. There are also physical treatments that do not involve ingesting anything.

These solutions can provide healthy, natural ways of treating erectile dysfunction without having to use prescription medications, allowing you to keep up a healthy, natural lifestyle as you age.

Before Treatment, Know What You’re Treating

Erectile dysfunction is defined as either not being able to become erect at all, or having an erection that is not firm enough or does not last long enough for sexual intercourse. At age 40, approximately two out of every five men will have dealt with some degree of erectile dysfunction.

When you get an erection, the body releases the chemical nitric oxide which signals the muscles around the penis to relax and allow blood flow into the penis to increase. If there is not enough blood flowing into the penis, too much blood flowing out of the penis, or if the signal cannot make it to the penis in the first place, this will result in erectile dysfunction.

Talk to your doctor to get a proper diagnosis before you attempt to treat erectile dysfunction yourself. There are a wide variety of conditions that can affect the delicate nerves and blood vessels that trigger erections, and many of them are serious. These can include atherosclerosis, Parkinson’s disease, hypertension or physical trauma. The cause of erectile dysfunction will also influence the effectiveness of  various treatment options. Many treatments help increase circulation and blood flow to the penis, but if there is nerve damage due to surgery or chronic illness such as diabetes, these solutions may not work or will have less of an effect.

Erectile dysfunction will often go away when the underlying causes are treated. If this does not happen, or you wish to treat erectile dysfunction right away, make sure that your erectile dysfunction treatments will not interact with any other treatments or medications you may be taking.

Herbs & Herbal Supplements

There are many supplements available that are derived from herbs found around the world. These herbal supplements have varying degrees of effectiveness and some have their own side effects, despite being natural solutions. Talk to your doctor before taking them.

- HORNY GOAT WEED is a flowering plant that grows in China. It has become a popular treatment for erectile dysfunction. Horny goat weed contains chemicals which work similarly to sildenafil (Viagra). These chemicals allow the body’s own nitric oxide to flow more freely, enhancing blood flow to the penis. Studies show that sildenafil is much more potent than horny goat weed. So far most studies done on horny goat weed have been carried out in a laboratory, not in human patients. More research is needed to determine exactly how effective horny goat weed really is and what the proper dosing should be. Horny goat weed can have side effects, such as slowing blood clotting and lowering blood pressure. People who are taking medications such as anticoagulants should check with their doctor to make sure there is no risk of interaction before taking horny goat weed.

-GINSENG, in particular Korean red ginseng, has been used for a long time in Asia as a treatment for erectile dysfunction but studies have not been able to confirm its benefits. Experts aren’t sure how ginseng might work, though it’s thought to promote nitric oxide synthesis. It is possible for ginseng to interact with some medications and some people have had allergic reactions to it.

-YOHIMBE is derived from the bark of a tree found in west and central Africa. There is a clinical version known as yohimbine hydrochloride which is stronger than the herbal form and used to be prescribed for erectile dysfunction before other medications such as sildenafil became available. Experts no longer recommend the use of yohimbe because it is not considered particularly effective and is associated with several side effects such as headache, high blood pressure and anxiety.

-GINKO BILOBA is derived from the leaves of the gingko biloba tree. Like the other herbal remedies listed, it is available in supplement form. Though gingko biloba has been used in the past as a treatment for erectile dysfunction, scientific studies have been unable to confirm whether or not it actually works. One study found it was effective but further, more rigorous studies were not able to reproduce those results.

Dietary Solutions

In some cases, a solution to erectile dysfunction could be found in a change to your diet. There are certain chemicals found in foods that may have a beneficial effect, though there is not much research in this area. The major advantage of this approach is that there is not likely to be any side effects, so there’s not much risk in trying it.

-L-ARGININE is an amino acid found in many common foods, including turkey, chicken, soy beans, peanuts, pumpkin seeds and many others. It boosts the body’s production of nitric oxide, which can make it easier to achieve an erection. Because it is so common, it is easy to add L-arginine to your diet. Tests involving L-arginine have had mixed results. A 1999 trial published in the online journal BJU International found that high doses of L-arginine can help improve sexual function, but only in men with abnormal nitric oxide metabolism, such as that associated with cardiovascular disease.

-POMEGRANATE JUICE has also shown potential, although in only one small-scale study. Further research will be needed before experts can say whether or not it has any actual effect on sexual performance.

Other

DEHYDROEPIANDROSTERONE (DHEA) is a hormone produced by your body’s adrenal glands. It is converted to testosterone and oestrogen in the body, increasing the levels of both. Over-the-counter supplements are available and are derived from wild yams and soy.

If a testosterone imbalance is the cause of your erectile dysfunction, then DHEA supplements can help, however only about 5% of erectile dysfunction cases are caused by testosterone imbalance.

DHEA has numerous side-effects such as high blood pressure, hair loss, headache and rapid or irregular heartbeat. It can also interact with other medications and medical conditions. Experts are not certain of what the long-term effects are from taking DHEA and caution against it.

Remember to talk to your doctor before taking any hormone supplement

Erectile dysfunction is more common than many people realise. Several studies have shown that about two out of five men will be affected by erectile dysfunction at the age of 40. Unfortunately, despite being so common, there is still a stigma surrounding erectile dysfunction that prevents people from talking about it. Many men don’t know how to deal with erectile dysfunction when it happens because of this lack of communication. Their relationship with their partner suffers because neither knows how to address the situation. The purpose of this section is to serve as a guide for those who think their partner may have erectile dysfunction. It provides tips on how to address the topic and find solutions while maintaining a strong relationship.

The Basics of Erectile Dysfunction

Erectile dysfunction comes in many different forms. A person might be completely unable to achieve an erection, they may have an erection that is too soft or doesn’t last very long. If these conditions happen to the point that they are interfering with sexual intercourse, it is considered erectile dysfunction. Erectile dysfunction can happen only occasionally and be temporary, or it can be a chronic condition. If it doesn’t occur very often, it probably doesn’t require medical treatment, but if someone is experiencing erectile dysfunction more than half the time, they should consult their doctor.

There are many causes of erectile dysfunction, which is one of the reasons why it is such a common condition. Diseases such as heart disease, high blood pressure, Parkinson’s disease or diabetes can all lead to erectile dysfunction by damaging either the blood vessels or the nerves in the penis. There are also many medications that can cause erectile dysfunction as a side-effect. Anything that affects the circulatory system and prevents enough blood from getting into the penis or allows too much blood to flow out of the penis can cause erectile dysfunction. In addition to that, anything that affects the nervous system can prevent signals from the brain reaching the penis to trigger erection.

Psychological factors can bring on erectile dysfunction as well. If a person is experiencing a lot of stress or anxiety, this can lead to difficulty achieving an erection. They may also experience erectile dysfunction if they are suffering from depression or have low self-esteem.

How to Talk About Erectile Dysfunction

People who are dealing with erectile dysfunction will often try to avoid the issue for a variety of reasons. They may feel like something is wrong with them or feel embarrassed that they can’t fulfil what they perceive to be their duties in the relationship. They might feel like they can’t please their partner and feel ashamed because of it, or they may worry that their partner will become dissatisfied and leave.

These feelings can lead to anxiety about their sexual performance, making erectile dysfunction more likely to occur in the future.

People dealing with erectile dysfunction will often attempt to avoid the issue by completely avoiding sexual encounters. A sudden lack of physical intimacy coupled with a breakdown of communication predictably causes the relationship to suffer.

Re-establishing communication with your partner is one of the most important things to do when dealing with erectile dysfunction. Many people who have difficulty addressing erectile dysfunction at first find it easier to talk about once the topic has been brought up.

Be prepared to discuss what has been happening physically and how it has been affecting you and your partner emotionally. If your partner has been trying to avoid thinking about the issue, they may not have much to say at first. That’s okay.

The conversation doesn’t have to happen all at once. It’s okay for the initial conversations to only be a few minutes, so long as the issues are discussed. Addressing the issue slowly can give your partner time to warm up to the idea and understand their own feelings on the issue, leading to an easier and more productive conversation next time.

Just make sure the issue does not get dropped completely.

Both you and your partner should acknowledge that there is no one at fault. Let your partner know that he will not be judged for having erectile dysfunction. Even without sexual intercourse, it is still possible to be a good partner and have a healthy and fulfilling relationship.

It may be necessary to discuss new ways of being physically intimate without sexual intercourse. This can take away much of the psychological pressure your partner may be feeling to “perform” while you search for other solutions.

When discussing erectile dysfunction, there is no script for couples to follow. There are many different ways that people can react to having erectile dysfunction. While you should be prepared with certain topics and issues to address, nobody can tell you precisely how the conversation should go.

Finding a Solution

There are many different treatment options available, each with their own advantages and disadvantages. A proper diagnosis from a doctor will help determine which is best treatment option for your partner and you.

Vacuum therapy is a common solution which is both affordable and effective. It works by using a vacuum pump to gently draw blood into the penis, inducing an erection. Using an elastic support ring to hold the blood in, an erection can be held for up to 30 minutes.

Vacuum therapy solutions allow for more spontaneity than other solutions because they are used immediately before intercourse. The devices can also be operated by either partner, allowing them to be incorporated into foreplay and opening up new avenues for intimacy.

The side effects of vacuum therapy are relatively minor. Some people may experience some bruising when they first start using it. The erections that result may also be colder than usual, which can be off putting for some couples. Some disorders, such as sickle cell disease, may lead to complications with the device.

About 90% of people who use vacuum therapy devices say they are satisfied with the results. Because there is no drug involved, there is no risk of interactions with other medications, making vacuum therapy a very safe solution for erectile dysfunction.

There are also a variety of medications that a person can take to treat erectile dysfunction. These can either be taken orally or injected into the base of the penis. There are also medications which are inserted directly into the urethra. These medications work by enhancing the effects of nitric oxide, which is released by the body and causes blood to flow into the penis.

If someone is already taking nitrate based medications to treat high blood pressure or heart problems, some erectile dysfunction medications can interact with these and lead to a dangerous drop in blood pressure.

Overall, medications have a satisfaction rate of about 70%, but there are some situations where they may not be effective. If there is nerve damage preventing signals from the brain reaching the penis, for example, the effectiveness of medications can drop to as low as 5%.

There are also prosthetic devices which can be surgically implanted, although this is usually an extreme measure that is taken after other treatment options have failed. The prosthetic can take the form of a malleable rod or an inflatable tube which is implanted along with a fluid pump and reservoir.

The risks associated with prosthetic implants are the same as with any surgery. There is a chance of infection and complications during surgery or from the anaesthetic. This option is used after others have failed and the satisfaction rate is over 90%.

Next Steps

When seeking a solution to erectile dysfunction, the first thing to do is talk to your doctor. As previously mentioned, erectile dysfunction can have many different causes. Treating the underlying condition can eliminate erectile dysfunction.

Erectile dysfunction is often an early symptom of a more serious condition. Getting a examination from a physician right away can lead to an early diagnosis, which can be life saving.

If erectile dysfunction is being caused by medication, a doctor may be able to recommend an alternative medication or a lower dose. If neither of these is an option, they may be able to recommend a solution that is be compatible.

A physician may also be able to recommend a counsellor to help with the psychological aspects of erectile dysfunction. Counsellors can help you and your partner communicate and redefine intimacy while seeking a long-term erectile dysfunction solution.

Communication is the most important aspect of dealing with erectile dysfunction as a couple. Talking about erectile dysfunction may be awkward and uncomfortable at first, but it is an important first step.

Erectile dysfunction is often referred to as “trouble in the bedroom,” however the impact of ED often reaches beyond the bedroom, affecting many parts of a person’s life and relationship with their partner. Feelings of embarrassment, along with guilt, anxiety or low self-esteem, cause many men to avoid the issue. This leads to a breakdown in communication between the man and his partner, and the relationship suffers as a result.

If a man experiencing erectile dysfunction has already tried a treatment which didn’t work out, the psychological impact can be even greater. He may feel that it’s a lost cause or simply not worth the trouble. There is no reason for embarrassment, though. At age 40, it is estimated that four out of every ten men are dealing with erectile dysfunction. That ratio increases to seven out of ten by age 70. And, though it becomes more common as men get older, it can happen at any age. A study at one outpatient clinic found that a quarter of men seeking treatment were under the age of 40.

There are a wide variety of issues that can cause erectile dysfunction. Vascular diseases can affect the blood flow to and from the penis, and neurological disorders or injuries can disrupt the signals sent from the brain to trigger arousal. Even men who are physically healthy can experience erectile dysfunction brought on by stress or anxiety.

The good news is that there are always treatment options for erectile dysfunction. Even if previous attempts have failed, there are many effective alternatives for men of any age and in almost any condition.

Why Some Treatments Fail

Mainstream oral medications for erectile dysfunction such as sildenafil or tadalafil are very popular, but they are not the right option for everyone. There are a variety of reasons why oral medications may not work for everyone. These reasons range from ineffectiveness or dangerous risks for certain groups of men to side effects which may not be tolerable. Men taking nitrates for heart problems can experience dangerous interactions with erectile dysfunction medications. Erectile dysfunction medications work by enhancing the impact of nitric oxide to allow greater blood flow. Combining these with heart or blood pressure medications can lead to a sharp and sudden drop in blood pressure.

Erectile dysfunction medications simply cannot overcome some problems. They allow for greater blood flow to the penis but if there is nerve damage due to surgery or illness, the signal triggering blood flow will not get through and the medication will not be effective. It’s also possible that the blood vessels are too damaged for oral medications to be effective. In this case some find that their erections improve, but not enough for intercourse.

In approximately 25 percent of cases, erectile dysfunction is the result of psychological issues such as stress, depression or anxiety. In these cases, the assistance of a specialist may be needed to help with these issues before erectile dysfunction can be addressed.

There are also several side-effects associated with medications for erectile dysfunction. After taking them, many men experience headaches, flushing, nasal congestion or an upset stomach. The particular effects can vary depending on which drug you are taking. Though these effects are usually considered minor, and some men may experience them to a lesser degree than others or not at all, for some they may be enough to spoil the mood.

It’s important to remember that a failed treatment is nobody’s fault. Even in the best case scenario, medications only work 75 to 80 percent of the time and in many circumstances the success rate is much lower. Doing the maths, that means of all men who are at age 70, about 1 in 7 will be dealing with erectile dysfunction that is not successfully treated with oral medication.

Vacuum Therapy

Though popular, oral medications are not the only way to deal with erectile dysfunction. Vacuum therapy solutions such as those offered by Men’s Health Downunder are another option. Vacuum therapy offers many advantages over medication. Vacuum therapy systems are very easy to use and work by using a vacuum to gently pull blood into the penis, creating an erection.

A plastic cylinder is placed over the penis and a pump is used to create the vacuum. Then, an elastic support ring is moved from the cylinder to the base of the penis before the cylinder is removed. The support ring holds the blood in the penis and maintains the erection for up to 30 minutes.

Men who have limited use of their hands due to arthritis or neurological issues can find vacuum therapy systems difficult to use. They may have difficulty operating the pump or loading the support ring onto the cylinder.

Systems like the one offered by Men’s Health Downunder, however, are designed to make their use as easy and simple as possible. They come with a loading cone and a device to assist with loading the support ring. Electric pumps are available. If the system is still too cumbersome, a willing partner can operate it, creating another opportunity for intimacy and bonding.

Vacuum therapy systems are discrete, requiring only a single purchase instead of repeated visits to the pharmacy. After ordering a system, nobody outside the bedroom need know that vacuum therapy is being used.

The systems are more effective at treating erectile dysfunction than oral medications. Of men who use vacuum therapy, 90% report satisfaction with the device. Unlike oral medications, which can take up to two hours to reach peak effect, vacuum therapy devices are used immediately before intercourse. There is no need to plan ahead and no fear of wasting a dose if plans get interrupted. Some couples also believe that there is more romance when there is more spontaneity.

There are very few side effects with vacuum therapy devices. The most common issue is a cooler-than-average temperature of the penis when it is erect, and some men experience slight bruising. Because the system is natural and there are no drugs entering the body, vacuum therapy devices can be used in conjunction with other medications and even other erectile dysfunction treatments. No prescription is required to purchase a vacuum therapy system.

After using a vacuum therapy device, most men are able to regain sexual function. Once couples are able to begin enjoying a healthy sex life again, men who were having difficulty dealing with erectile dysfunction are able to move past it and begin repairing their relationship and regaining their confidence.

Next Steps

No matter what phase you are at in dealing with erectile dysfunction, it is important to maintain open and honest communication with your partner throughout the process. This will minimise the impact erectile dysfunction has on your relationship and make it easier to get past the problem.

• Physiotherapist
• Sexologist
• Counsellor
• Psychologist
• Acupuncturist